My first meeting with the Bereavement Therapist took place this morning. It went well.
Now I have an idea why all those residents of Buenos Aires are so fond of their therapy! It’s nice to have someone ask you questions and listen as you talk about the things the have happened in your life.
I didn’t know what to expect before the meeting but Peter quickly put me at ease. He asked me questions such as:
Why was I meeting him?
How was I in general?
What happened to LittleGirl?
How has her death changed my life?
What is the worst aspect of what has happened?
I didn’t see him scribbling any big asterisks beside any of his notes as I answered so I’m satisfied that he doesn’t think I’m nuts! 🙂
Some of these questions he asked were difficult to answer – perhaps precisely because I hadn’t thought of things in particular ways before, but his queries did get me thinking about the issues raised, and I suppose they will settle into the back of my mind and I’ll mull over them until the next time.
I asked him why or how I might benefit from speaking with him, and told him that until a couple of months ago I couldn’t see the point as things ‘are how they are’ and talking wasn’t going to change anything. His response was that there is no ‘plan’ or target to be achieved by meeting him, and that his task was to help people to explore their experiences, perhaps from angles that they would not come up with on their own.
His key piece of advice to me was to go with how I’m feeling at any given time. Not to feel like I should be walking around looking sad because others might expect it, nor to feel guilty if I find myself having a good time and a laugh.
As I drove away I started thinking of things I could have said in response to his questions…I must note them down and raise them the next time we meet.